The power to climb trees really fast, but they shrink when you do.

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The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

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The ability to walk five hundred miles but than you have to walk five hundred more.

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the power to fly, but only 1 inch over the ground

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The power to discern the breed of a cat by the taste of its poop.

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The power to understand irony.

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All of aquaman's powers.

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The power to pick your nose but you happen to be Lord Voldermot

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The power to handle the truth. Moral: Because with the exception of a few good men... YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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the power to burn your school down from napalm farts.

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The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

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The ability to hover slightly above the ground on Wednesdays.

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The power to have to answer to morons while I put morals under EVERY one of my comments... Moral: At this point asking you makes you a trucking moron. Moral: Just to annoy you. Moral: And everyone is pointless so if you get annoyed, well that is your pointless superpower... hahaha!

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Be virtually indestructible, but only to things your not paying attention too.

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The ability to perceive the presence of light.... with your ears. (warning, blindness may effect abilities potency.)

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The ability to teleport to distant locations with no way of returning.

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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The power to troll.

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The power to be hating when you see me rollin. Moral: ;D

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The power to think of a clever comeback as soon as the person has left the room.

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the power to transform into a rock.

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The Power to Die if you are dead

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the power not eat more than one pringel.

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the ability to give a potato an orgasm

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!