The power to find pokemon attractive

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The power to make all girls look pretty but only in your head and only if you drunk enough.

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the power to undress yourself at a slower rate then others

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The ability to perfectly walk backwards but only when you are sat down.

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The power to worsen your own eyesight at will.

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The power to have sex with any woman you want, but you are gay

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the ability to kill yourself... twice

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The ability to listen to music anywhere at anytime, but only if it's from the Jonas Brothers.

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the ability to run as fast as you want but never be able to slow down...

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The power to compare anything to pr0n because "you know it when you see it."

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The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

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understanding every language only if you get insulted

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The power to run at the speed of ligth but only when running complete circles

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the power to destroy the planet you are standing on

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The power to teleport, but only to life threatening situations.

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The power to be black, but only if you are at a KKK meeting

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The power to eat razorblades, but only when covered in a mixture of antifreeze, bile and tabasco sauce.

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The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

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the power to teleport to the center of the earth

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The power to smell like body odor at will

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The ability to see everything in black and white.

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The power to turn brass into gold, but only when the brass is made of gold.

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The Ability to shit studs once a week

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The power to eat food.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!