The power to live,but only when you are dead

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The power to listen to Meghan Straight talk

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The power to fart get a 10 inch but only at your moms house

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The power to run at the speed of invisibility.

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The power to stop existing.

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The power to fart out of your hands.

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The power to set money on fire

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The power to look at someone and imaginatively initiate intercourse in the most unreasonable way possible.

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The power to make any woman fall in love with you (Single or not) But during sex you can't pull out and protection always fails.

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The power to run at the speed of ligth but only when running complete circles

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the power to lower my blood presure to dangerous levels

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power to poop out 5x5 ice cube

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the ability to see one-half of a second into the future, but only activates while sneezing.

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The power to rain fireballs down upon those you love.

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the power to look like a boy and sing like a girl (bieber joke)

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The power to do reverse moonwalk

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Beeing 99% Bullet proof, with the 1% shifting places to whereever a bullet is about to hit you.

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The power to be a woman

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The power to sit on a couch whenever your mother tells you that you can.

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the power to talk to animals.......without them understanding you.

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to be shitty

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The power to smell bacon and/or ham at 3 o clock in the afternoon on the second Saturday of March

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The power to see through clothes of only ugly people

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The power to become Santa Clause, but only on the fourth of July.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!