the power to nap instantly, but only when you're tired.

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the power to have a larger erection, but only when your alone.

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the ability to turn into random hats

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The power to communicate with earthworms.

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the power to grow hair 0.00000000001% faster

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The power to not have any powers

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Power to not have any power.

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The ability to see through invisibility.

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the power to fly twice every 22 years for 6 seconds in you room with the door closed

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the power to get an erection in gym class while doing jumping jacks

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The power to shoot 1 watt of lightning from your hands

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The power to run faster than you walk.

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the power to teleport 1 inch every year

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The ability to make the wait at the DMV 1,000% longer.

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The power to breath Earth's air, but if you stop breathing, or breath something other than air, you die.

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power to make you the last man on earth, but all the ladies are lesbian

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the power to poop out cactuses when no toilets are in a hour drive length away

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tree powers (the power to turn into a tree)

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The power to be illiterate when you open a book.

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The power to trespass walls but only half their thickness.

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Moral man. Moral: I have self irony... which isn't a superpower... neither is being me... But its at least Super pointless and I have the power to do this... SO CLOSE! SO DAMN CLOSE! :(

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the ability to turn a banana into an apple at will, but only for a few seconds.

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The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

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The power to make anything smell like beets by touching it and saying "Sideburn!"

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!