the power that will cut off your penis and just growing it back for every hour of your life

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The amazing ability to hack peoples profiles only when they're logged in.

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The power to travel back and forth in time by pressing your left elbow against your right armpit. It really works! Try it!

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The power to disappear only when you're about to have sex.

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The power to go back in time, but only 1 second back and with a 10 second recharge.

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the power to tell Austin Zachrich to go pee

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The power of hearing peoples conversations but only on topics related to Shrek.

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YOU CAN WISH BUT IT WILL NOT COME TRUE -.-

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The power to levitate 0.000000000000001mm off the ground when going up stairs.

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Where to start? Ah yes...THE POWER TO NOT FREAKING DO ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The power to recharge batteries by licking them.

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The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

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The astounding ability to lay eggs instead of give birth.

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The power to be able to write the worlds best book or movie script but if anyone reads it, it will combust into flames.

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The power to teleport, but in doing so you lose a limb.

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The ability to breathe and swallow at the same time.

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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Qu1. Why is Steven Hawking so smart A. Because he's half robot. Qu.2. Why is Albert Einstein so smart A. He got forced to try things.

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The power of perfect 20/20 hindsight

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The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

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The power to implode when you have pee and you can't stop

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The power to explode the entire world every time you became happy.

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The power to fell pain 3 minutes after it happens.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!