The power to fart through your mouth and burb through your butt

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to be only be able to walk for 0.0183874662 ever 11.204882884832 days

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The power to recharge batteries by licking them.

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The power to mentally control tapeworms.

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The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

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The astounding ability to lay eggs instead of give birth.

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The power to be able to write the worlds best book or movie script but if anyone reads it, it will combust into flames.

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The power to grab a cup of purple drank, Then drink it

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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The ability to breathe and swallow at the same time.

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The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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The ability to replace your DNA with parmesan cheese.

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The power of knowing every fact about dolphins

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Qu1. Why is Steven Hawking so smart A. Because he's half robot. Qu.2. Why is Albert Einstein so smart A. He got forced to try things.

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The power of perfect 20/20 hindsight

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The power to have an indestructible tongue.

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The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

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The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

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The power to explode the entire world every time you became happy.

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the power to like charlie

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the power to imagine any women naked...but only as an octogenerian

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The power to be stupid reading this.

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Acid tears.

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The superpower to get your comment in the tops because you mistyped "the pewer to type backwards" backwards. Its a funny story actually, you people liked it so much that it skyrocketed past the correctly spelled ones and turned out top.. 40 or something? I am being modest here... just go into the popular sections and take a look. I would have told you it was me who wrote that super pewer but you would not really believe me would you? By the way thanks, it made me laugh, and I hope that is the same reason you thumbed it up, you people are awesome! Moral: It was me. (I mistyped the word mistyped itself which is grammatically incorrect by itself, now beam me up Scotty!)

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!