The power to wake up to surprise sex in the morning... in prision.

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The ability to heat up an object by 1 degree for every week you hold it.

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To be able to bend glass at will but if any of the glass breaks you break with it.?

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The power to have incredible strength, in the bathroom.

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to make asians smart

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The power to be able to fall asleep instantly

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The power to get an erection watching gay porn

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The power to use you`re veins as a lasso.

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The power to get your comment 1st

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The ability to spit in random obscure crayola colors.

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The power to have super speed for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 milliseconds a century

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The power to paralyze yourself from the waist-up.

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The power to stop time, but only when you are waiting for something.

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Being only half invisible.

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The power to recite all digits of pi, but you can’t stop and you die when you’re done

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The power to drive any Lamborghini or other shit expensive car you want. You still need to get a car like that though...

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the power to buy something worth 1.95$ when you only have 1.94$

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The Power To Have Only (This) One Power.

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The power to mind reeds

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the ability to make your penis more sophistcated than yourself

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The ability to turn cement into pudding

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The power to shoot a any amount of milk out of your belly button every July 4th at 2 o'clock

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The power to transport yourself back in time to when the universe began!

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The power of laser vision only while eating Oscar Mayer hot dogs.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!