The power to temporarily give yourself a random STD.

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The power to hear people from across the globe, make people move with your own mind, and the ability to make people disappear from the Earth. Ladies and Gentleman, I call it MMORPG!

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The power to change your emotions at will.

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the power to make as many dogs appear as you want but they don't listen to anyone and they have rabies

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The power to recite all digits of pi, but you can’t stop and you die when you’re done

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The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

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The power to eat nandos

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The ability to turn into a were-turtle when exposed to the full moon.

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the power of superspeed but only backwards

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The power to become white by going into midtown harlem at night and shouting: I HATE NEGROES!!! At the top of your lungs.

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The power to teleport to the exact location there is a terrorist atack

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The power to make the key on your keyboard not work

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having the same super powers as batman!

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The power to fly but only when your in space.

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the power to fire angry ticks out of your nipples

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The power to automatically yell every action you do like in a Japanese fighting game, I once started doing this for fun, at the end of the day eveyone hated me, good luck. (OPEN DOOR! OPEN DOOR! CLOSE DOOR! POOL SHOT! CUMMING HARD CUMMING HARD! SONIC BOOM! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! TAKING A PUNCH TO THE FACE UPPERCUT!)

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The ability to explode. With no healing factor.

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The power to believe I type actual morals. Moral: At horsehead network? Now please go look for prostitutes at a church or astronauts under the sea you fucklng ass and blahblah!

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The power to have omniscience but can't speak and have Alzheimer's.

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The Power to make 0 dollar bills.

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The power to be hungry without eating a Snickers bar.

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the power to get a 100" erection but only over your dead greatgrandma

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The power of walk on the water if it is frozen.

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The power to read 20 pages of pointless superpowers, but only during science class

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!