the power to feed a dog peanut butter and not laugh

thumb_up thumb_down +145

The power to run 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% slower.

thumb_up thumb_down +133

The ability to use the "wait" function from skyrim/fallout in real life.

thumb_up thumb_down +121

solar powered night-vision

thumb_up thumb_down +121

The power to wipe ur ass without the need of toilet paper

thumb_up thumb_down +113

The power to determine after 1 year that something is broken when you yourself have done it deliberately broken

thumb_up thumb_down +111

The power to yawn with your mouth closed

thumb_up thumb_down +109

The ability to turn into a were-turtle when exposed to the full moon.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

the power to shit your pants uncontrollably when your mom calls your name

thumb_up thumb_down +107

The power to know exactly how events would have turned out, had the last event gone differently

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to become a laptop forever!

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to shoot off your clothes at any moment while using your hands and feet

thumb_up thumb_down +99

The power to be dead

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to shit out toilet paper.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to be invisible but only in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

The power to instantly engrave your face into any urinal anywhere at will.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

-The ability to turn friction on and off.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to hate/love/care about me because of who I am. Moral: Relax dear friends (you other fools relax too) I was born this way, and I love every second of it, I am on fire and this workout gives me so damn much pheromones and testosterone that I am gonna invite a cute friend and have a damn threesome! Why, because its a mans world... never forget that kids...

thumb_up thumb_down +87

The power to ejaculate laser beams.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

the ability to walk through your clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The ability to smell shit from miles away.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

the power to be permanently unconfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down +79

Ability to shape-shift into your twin brother.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The power to know what you're going to have for dinner on any given day 10 years from now.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!