The power to slap your buttcheeks together, then transform into a head of cabbage.

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The power to save all that time your new fast boil kettle has saved you

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The power to travel in time for 2 seconds

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the power to know when your about to get rick rolled

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The power to understand the purpose of life, and every other world mystery, exactly .5 of a second before you die.

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The power to hear other people's thoughts when they aren't thinking.

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the power to like Liam Brudenell, That is pointless

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To teleport to space and then emediately suffocate.

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The ability to sense any and all ham in a five mile radius.

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The power to poop but only in bushes.

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The ability to spit in random obscure crayola colors.

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The ability to have every possible thought as fast as the Flash is capable of moving and faster and know how every scenario can, will, and most likely will play out, yet you cannot say anything about them and they cannot be put to use. As well as no one can read your mind or anything similar to obtain said knowledge.

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the ability to give a potato an orgasm

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The power to go suicide

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The ability to money into dog shit.

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The power to incriminate yourself in a crime you didnt commit

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The power to be 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 seconds younger

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The power to turn all people into giant robots which you don't control

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The power to see in the dark while exposed to sunlight.

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The power to breathe

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The power of speaking every laguage on earth, but to know only one word in your entire life.

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The power to summon tastebuds in your asshole, but cannot be undone within 24 hours.

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The power to see through glass. Oh wait.

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The power to fall down in a forest, and, if none is around, noone will hear you.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!