The power to look extremely bored and emotionless when typing "lol" or "xD"

The power to run at the speed of ligth but only when running complete circles

the ability to manually control your breathing

the power to destroy the planet you are standing on

The power to achieve 98% opacity

The power to comment on Facebook with a pencil.

The power to start time.

the power to have good enough grammar to phrase the fu**ing power you want to share without sounding like a retarded deaf 6 year old

The power to text while driving and dies of cancer.

the power to fly but only about 5 feet above the grove, and only after you fart

power to poop out 5x5 ice cube

The power to bleed anally at will

The power to see what a person is wearing.

The power to turn brass into gold, but only when the brass is made of gold.

the power to be able to get pointless superpowers

The ability to be bulletproof after you get shot.

The Ability to shit studs once a week

The power to go in jail every time you are alone.

the power to kill plants in a desert.

The ability to create bruises on your body but not know where they came from, and then poke them.-.Jack

The power to walk on frozen water.

The power to die when you get scared.

The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

The power to produce fingernails at will that people can eat.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!