the power to move something right next to you

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The power to grow hair on your eyeballs

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The power to summon huge snowstorms, but only on the weekend.

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the power to teleport yourself to a volcano core

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The power to fly while masturbating.

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The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

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ability to run very fast without stopping forever

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The power to have everyone in the universe believe you are dead. Including you.

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The power to turn the tv off from 0.00000000001 inches away, with your mind, but it takes half an hour to actually turn off. This superpower runs out whenever you come within a mile of a tv.

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The power to think of a pointless superpower

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mime-o-moid. The power to pretend to be stuck in a box, walk a dog and climb a rope.

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The power to make your nose blink.

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The power to become tired at will but never sleep.

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The ability to make food disappear from a plate by putting it in your body.

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The power to walk thru mud and not leave a footprint

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The power to when you get scared, you fart.

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Immunity to everything, except diseases that cause death.

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The ability to fart pee.

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The ability to have X-Ray vision that only works on glass.

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Hearing so good a raindrop will deafen you

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The power to make people believe it wasn't' you who just farted

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The power to be unconscious during Calculus class.

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The ability to levitate but only if you're touching the ground

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The power to press the "I have read and agree with the terms on service -" button without actually reading them.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!