the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The power to expand the size of your head and gain weak telekinesis, but you die in 3 days, the bigger you make your head, the more powerful your telekinesis but the faster you die.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

The power to die

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to see John Cena, but only when he taps out/gives up.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

.sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop ehT

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The ability to catch bullets traveling under 5 mph

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The power to make people work and read ????

thumb_up thumb_down +17

The power for shampoo to never go in your eyes, but only when its Johnsons No More Tears.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The power to pull your heart out from your chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The power to do anything as if you were god but only after you slay a mythical dragon and eat an Unicorn's poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The ability to make your body colder in cold whether and hotter in hot whether

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The power to teleport yourself to the nearest exit location.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

the power to glow in the dark during the day.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

The power to become a carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

The power to remember everything then forgetting it 10 seconds later.

thumb_up thumb_down +118

The power of shrinking your own anus to subatomic size.

thumb_up thumb_down +110

The power to buy "I cant believe its not butter" and turn the damn thing into real butter.

thumb_up thumb_down +106

The power to demand people to thumb you down! (That would make this pointless power even more pointless, which deserves a thumbs up... but...) Moral: THUMB ME DOWN! NAO!

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to ma-FUK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSY

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Being able to not go to the bathroom...when you have to!

thumb_up thumb_down +68

The power to speak with dead relatives, but only whilst masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

The power of bullet atraction

thumb_up thumb_down +62

that each time your nearest friend gets hurt you get hurt with it more with 10 times

thumb_up thumb_down +52

The power to post hundreds of pointless superpowers in minutes. Moral: It is always fun to see another person`s comment between mine with zero thumbs, while mine always keep the excellent two thumb quality! Lesser man would say thank you... I say you are welcome everybody ;) (A moral man original, because someone needs the balls of steel required to see things how they really are)

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!