The power to type 1,000 words per minute, but only on a 12 key tracphone ®

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The power to think outside the bun.

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The power to look busy at work but only when the boss is not looking.

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the ability to smile a tooth grin while pooping on your own chest

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The ability to jizz uncontrollably in your pants randomly during the day

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The power to jump and fly for 1 second.

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The power to ejaculate only when you're greeting someone

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The power to only make burnt toast

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The poewr to selpl eryvetihng wonrg.

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The power to remember every moment of your suckish life

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The power to be Chuck Norris. Oh wait..

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The power to have the strength of 50 old people

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The power to fly but only when you are in a winged aircraft.

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The power to start time only when it's on.

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The power to die

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The ability to control water but only when it is raining

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The power to watch Kristin Stewart "act" in any movie.

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levi Hahne is gay

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the power to say funny joke, but only deaf people can hear it.

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The power to face plant at your own will, but not being able to stop.

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The power to kill yourself, but revive at the same age only to find yourself in the other gender.

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The power to find hiding spots quicker... like anne frank and osama bin ladin

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The power to remove the power within.

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The power to break your Nokia phone.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!