[insert pointless super powers here]

the power to wiggle your own arms in a weird fashion

The power to not move or do anything.... at all

the power to be on time daily, but only after ur late

the power to tie your shoelaces with one hand

The power to give epic blowjobs, works only if you are a incarcerated, straight male.

the power to change the size of your thumb when ever you want

The power to have super strength, however when you use it you instantly become paralyzed.

the power to fall off of a cliff and live... in hell

The power to create garbage out of nowhere.

The power to know what Willis is talking about.

make youself dumb

The power to have unlimited characters in youtube comments

The power to get a boner, but only when you're hugging your dad.

The power to see in the dark, unless your awake.

the power to get struck by lightning at will.

the power to suck but only when your awesome

the power to turn into a random piece of fruit.

The power to summon earthworms

TREE POWERS ACTIVATE!!!!!!

The ability to visually contract STD's

The power to have super-sonic hearing, but only in the presence of the mute.

the power to see the present.

The power to blink one second faster then usual.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!