The power to buy "I cant believe its not butter" and turn the damn thing into real butter.

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the power to read something without looking at it

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The power to see extremely far, and to see trough everything except yourself. Congrats you are stuck with seeing your own ass wherever you go for the rest of your life. Yeh i am moral man whatevs...

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the superpower to be able to fuck extremely good with or without genitals

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The power to open shampoo and conditioner bottles by blinking.

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The power to be able to run at the speed of light only when you have no energy to stand up

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The ability to not fart, but only while you are alone

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Having all the knowledge of the Internet... as of the mid-80s.

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The power to change your eye colour but you are the only one who can see the difference.

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The power to think about a location and forget that you travelled all the way there, making you think you can teleport.

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The power to cry whole bananas grown in Brazil.

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the power to eat out your but and poop out your mouth

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Wait this isn't pornhub!?

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The power to be yourself.

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The power to jerk off with no hands.

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done something sexual with some type of food?

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The power to magically summon a knife at a gunfight. Moral: "A knife in a gunfight is pretty good when the guns run out of ammo"

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The ability to find objects in the last place you look

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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The power to make a watch that functions as a small phone and is named after a fruit. I would call it Applewatch.

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The amazing ability to shart at your own will.

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The power to travel through time to get through school but then fail at life.

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The power to sense if an object is sharp.

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The power to give someone the power to give the power.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!