The power to wipe your ass once, and only once.

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The power to fly, but you have to wee every 5 seconds.

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The power of losing your power in the most crucial moment

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the power to be .13 cents short on every purchase you try to make.

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the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

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The power to not have powers that arent pointless but then you realize your a normal human bein then you just think hey mabey I can be like Batman but then also you were like hey why am I not a multi-billionaire . After this all you find out you have the power to wake up at 12 pm only while using a alarm clock set for 7 am

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The ability to kick in a three point shot but only during a game.

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The power to instantly ressurect at the very same spot if you get submerged under lava or acid.

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The power to become invisible, but it only works when you are using it for noble and moral purposes.

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The man who isn't afraid of sharks. Not even a little.

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The power to have a very keen sense of smell 24/7 but only when a fart is present

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The ability to know everything and get anything you want, but you must poop out a poop the size of a horse.

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the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

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the power to watch reruns of NBC's "Joey" in your head

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The power to get the most rated pointless superpowers post

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The power to transform into a 37 year old World of Warcraft playing virgin

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The power to remove the power within.

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The power to bleed out of your nose all the tme.

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The power to be bad at everything

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The power of intermittent hand seizures, at the most unfortunate of times.

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The ability to give yourself brain cancer at will

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The power to blink your eyelids in Morse Code

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The power to be buried at sea

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the ability to walk through your clothes

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!