the power to make stupid useless puns and not pay attention to the villian

thumb_up thumb_down +24

hey

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The power to change the channel of the television every 2 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The ability to not fart, but only while you are alone

thumb_up thumb_down +16

The ability to teleport into a wall

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Move things with your mind but only if you are holding them and you can't let go

thumb_up thumb_down +8

i remember coming up with one once, the ability to flash step, like teleportation, but it uses up the same amount of wear and tear on your body(and clothing/footwear) and stamina as if you walked a straight line there (say you were Stepping to the top of mount everest, the same amount of physical exhaustion and bodily wear and tear as if you tilted the earth, laid a flat board to the summit, and walked across it, and untilting the earth, all in an instant). where the only convenience obtained is time saved, but there would also be the issue of being constantly exhausted, the near limitless amounts of food needed to be consumed, and the constant need for sleep would make this power essentially useless except for convenience, you COULD say this is similar to stopping time, but with far more limitations, as its only used for moving from one place to another

thumb_up thumb_down

the ability to say "you're killing me", without irony...to my murderer

thumb_up thumb_down -2

the ability to make real zero dollar bills

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The power to have tacos appear in front of you, only to have them stolen by a black guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The power to have a very keen sense of smell 24/7 but only when a fart is present

thumb_up thumb_down -14

the power die if you think.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

The power of attracting lightning to your body, but not being imune to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

the power of the Anti-petter gun, which fires bullshit over the moon.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

The ability to see the world from a rock's perspective. Everywhere there is a rock you see what is around it. But rocks don't have eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

the ability to make a banana talk uncontrollably to itself but only when people around it are high. the ability to make a banana momentarily stop talking. the ability to allow a banana to sing uncontrollably songs strictly about being a banana, previously sung by a mammal. the ability to write funny things but only about banana(s).

thumb_up thumb_down -38

the power to be unable to have a power.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

The power to create a clean and temporary bathroom only you can use when you don't have to use one

thumb_up thumb_down -62

The ability to teleport into high security prisons but you cant teleport out

thumb_up thumb_down -86

The power to be a normal person

thumb_up thumb_down -98

The power to stop reading this. Or the power to live forever but only if you never ate BACON !

thumb_up thumb_down +157

The power to be able to see through clothes, but only men over the age of 65.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to make coins appear behind people's ears.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to sleep but only when its past midnight

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!