The power to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

The power to get pulled over for going 1mph over the speed limit.

AXE Body Spray Rituals--Learn Manly Rituals the Girls Can't Manliest Rituals &Get Her Affection

The power to change you`re mind at rando... the power to... hmm.. the... the.. AH! The power to... hmm... no... hmm...

the power two float in the air for three seconds but only when you fell of a cliff - jesse

The power to not hear thunder.

The power of immortality while suicidal.

The ability to obtain a date with any girl you want, but only if you are gay.

I can talk to fish.... They don't have a lot to say

the power to be .13 cents short on every purchase you try to make.

the power to make a super smelly fart every time you eat 40 cotton balls

The power to burst into flames but not be immune to heat.

The power to keep getting fat no matter how little you eat.

The power of turning on the lights without touching the switch but only when its daytime

How 'bout the power to move you? - Wonderboy

The power to create brilliant memes, but you don't have access to the internet.

the power to quickly re-wrap christmas presents

The power to have logs come out a tiny hole in your body. Oh wait... - SMC Digital

The power to shovel well. To shovel very well.

The power to have out bursts of funny inapropite jokes when ever u want............only while at a funeral

The power to have broads in Atlanta.

The power to type anything you want the same time you think of what you want to type.

The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

The ability to summon Cthulhu automatically when you reach the age of 23.5.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!