- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to pee out your butt and poop out of your weenie

The ability to piss lightning and be able to make people dance by wiggling your monobrow

The ability to know what people think of you when they see you. But you already know everyone hates you.

The power to emit a password protected wi-fi signal, but only while you sleep.

The power to turn your self into a rock that is being thrown into a volcano.

To be able to kill a Yak from 47 yards. No more, No less.

the power to save Chinese people... who needs um?

The ability to talk to parrots and have them talk back to you

The ability to feel all pain 30 seconds after it happens.

the ability to have every superpower that is pointless

The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

The power to use your legs in such a way that you can effectively walk,run or stay still whenever you want.

The power to permanently grow huge wonderful extremely heavy dragon wings, which do nothing but to weight you down and stand in the way. Fly? Nope, in fact you cant even walk now.

The power of being able to fly, but only on February 30th.

The power to shoot spiderwebs but only out of your fully erect dick

The power to read someone's mind, but only if they're thinking of tacos.

The power to see through transparent objects.

The power to die at any moment you want.

The power to liquify yourself.

The ability to control the universe everytime you lick your own elbow!

The power to smell everyone's crap from anywhere you go

The ability to day nearly motionless while binge watching internet videos

The power to teleport to the place of where you are

The power to sneeze scissors

Pointless Super Powers