The power to only be able to breath when you have absorbed the soul of a mythical dragon.

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The power to block every twenty third bullet, shot at point blank range.

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The power to feed cat toes to your boss but only during a job interview

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The power to heal people. But only sometimes and after you got a medical education.

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The power to appear in the center of the moon (in a hollow space) whenever you die.

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to not care about pointless superpowers

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The power to burst into flames but not be immune to heat.

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The ability to read a book by its cover

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The power to shit rainbows but have incredible pain while shitting them.

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The power to make out of thin air

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The ability to rape the willing.

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The ability to not freak out when your mom calls you

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The ability to draw an imperfect circle

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The power of telekinesis over any object one is physically touching.

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The ability to turn hamsters into pineapples.

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The power to think of a witty comeback 3 days too late.

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the power make tomatoes turn green.

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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The power to give vegetables immortality.

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The power to think with a 6 year time gap

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the ability to fly through the sky using the skin from your ballsack to glide to the ground

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the power to make people's spleen hurt for no reason

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The power to simply walk into mordor.

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The power to bring Magic: the Gathering cards to life, but only the land cards.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!