The power to be Chuck Norris's bitch.

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the power to have super strength but only wile you are sleeping,

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The Power to touch MC Hammer

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the power to misspell

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the power to stop masturbating every day

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The ability to pull open push only doors

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the ability to walk barefooted on top of legos without pain but only as long as you don't know they're legos

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The power to only see glass.

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The power to suck your own dick but not when your horny

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the power to eat bread

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The power to gain 400 pounds in 400 seconds.

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Power to turn off your computer randomly. You cannot controll that power.

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The power to not remember, the only problem, is that you don't remember having this awesome power.

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The power to win any game against a 5-year-old.

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The ability to transform in to a glass of water

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The power to swear if you do not believe in a God. Moral: Meh... if I post anything against God here you guys will thumb me down and that matters... it matters so much that I will use the section over to shit talk God... yeah... thumb me down already fearing zealots... show me your true power (being Gods bitches) now that is pointless power!

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The power to make any glass of water into milk

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Teh pewer off havin noo sentense speeled rite.

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The ability to fart, hiccup, vomit, crap, burp, laugh, cry, scream and sneeze all at the same time

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The power to look like Stephen Hawking but have none of his intelligence.

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The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

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The power to make broccoli turn purple and give it eyes

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The power to become famous on vine

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The power to think your dreams are real.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!