you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

The power to eat food a little faster. So when you are done you have to just stay there for 5 more minutes for everybody to finish

The power to bleed for 3-7 days for a week every month, and still live..

The power to die

The power to release the bogus

The power to think of a good super power right now.

The power to lose your voice when you yell a lot.

The power to hear in the dark.

The power to lick your balls.

The power to turn vaseline into mercury whenever you think about throwing away a perfectly good taco

The power to hurt other people by hurting yourself, and you both sustain the damage.

The power to predict the present

the power to create a meme

Having Wolverine’s ability to healing from any damage, but still healing at a normal human rate of recovery.

The power to have perfect vision, but only in pitch black darkness

make youself dumb

The power that when you sit down you fall through the seat

The power to grant underwater breathing to Mosquitos.

the power to charge rechargeable batteries.

The power to smell a fart from a 500 mile radius.

the power to be friends with Donald trump

The power to be the only homosexual in a house of 5 other people who are there for sex.

The power to be invisible to everything but security cameras.

the power of mind controlling...yourself

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!