- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to eat food a little faster. So when you are done you have to just stay there for 5 more minutes for everybody to finish

The power to know you don't have a superpower

to be one second faster than 5mph in any 80's arcade game using one finger to push the buttons

BULLET ATTRACTION.

The power to piss as if you were in zero gravity and leave your big piss ball floating in the bathroom.

The power to teleport yourself anywhere you want except for your major organs.

the power to walk on land.

The power to shoot iron from your blood

The amazing ability to shoot any liquid substance out of your eyes, with a requirement being you must douse your eyes with the substance beforehand.

The power to lose your voice when you yell a lot.

The power to make a woman make you a sandwich

The power to see the future five days after it has happend

The power to be invulnerable while sleeping

the power to fall at 9.9m per second.

The power to make any glass of water into milk

The power to do a wheelie on. Unicycle

The power to get rid of all advertisements, but only when your eyes are closed.

The power to control the weather, but only in space

The power to fuck any person of the opposite sex, but you're incredibly gay.

The power to chew with your tongue

the power to charge rechargeable batteries.

Absolute Defeatability- the power to be defeated by any and all things physical and nonphysiological.

The power to think up the best lines but forget them when you try to speak

The ability to not slip on banana peels

Pointless Super Powers