The power to take huge shits at will.

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The pointless superpower to miss moral man. He was a dick.

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The ability to straighten pictures on a wall with your mind.

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The power to know what weather its gonna be like in 1 minute... in South Korea

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the power to hovertate

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The power to ejaculate laser beams.

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Ability to be Stephen Hawking's stunt double.

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The power to become invisible, but it only works when you are using it for noble and moral purposes.

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The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

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the power of the succulent game

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The power to suck your own dick, by growing and shrinking your p3nis.

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The ability to get anyone answer your messages when the answer starts: What the...

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The power to smell WiFi Signals

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The power to murder rocks.

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The power to Grow a baby in a woman.... for 9 months.

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the power to get wider by eating junk food

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The power to sweat profusely on cold days.

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The power to change your position whenever you want. (I don't mean teleport I mean you can lay down while sitting or stand up while laying down)

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The ability to speak to deaf caterpillers

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The power to Silence everyone when they're saying anything

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the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

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the power of milking a cow aslong it is a horse that you are milking. the power to ride a bull for 0.55 nanoseconds. the power to kill 1 bacteria every 20 min. the power to spread herpes without having symptoms. the power of sharing awkward details of your bowel movements to your family at dinner. the power to lift a small cup of water. the power of falling of your face whilst knowing it will happen 20sec before. the power of inhibiting passage on the curb. the power to cause massive traffic jams without owning a car. the power of listening but not understanding. the power of understanding all languages but the one that is being spoken to you at the time.

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The power to have all sensory input interpreted as pain

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The power to make your self drunk using only your mind, but only while your driving your kids to school

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!