The power to shatter a mirror just by staring at it.

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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The power to die and come back to life in the middle of a crossfire between two tanks.

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The ability to swim in water.

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The ability to fly as high and as far as you want for 5 minutes, but you will always forget the time limit, and fall to the ground.

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the power to breathe in space but have to be were there is gravity

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The ability to grow and shrink in size, but you still have the same strength and weight and can only do it once a month

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the power to concentrate all the oil and grease in your body into one mega zit that you can pop at people, and possibly use as a propulsion system....if oily enough

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The power to read 1.2x faster than the average person.

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A man with the power to make sandwiches.

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The ability to part hair.

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The power to serve the Lord Dog.

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The ability to make knifes out of your own feces.

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The power to toss you`re limbs at your enemies, but not to re-attach them.

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The power to speak only one language

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To be able to summon old people

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The power to not write pointless powers.

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The ability to perfectly recall the and only the third digit in a series of numbers.

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the power to not finish your

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The power to grow your nose hair out to one hundred times its normal length.

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The power to both love and hate marmite.

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the power to send text messages while driving

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The power to freeze laptops when you're watching porn and someone comes in.

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The power to shoot money out of your hands, but only when your body is on fire.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!