The power to turn gourmet meals into shit.

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the power to finish your plate of veggies when ever you like.

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The power to make Macs appear instantly, but be unable to left-click on them.

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The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

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The power to have your toe nails and fingernails be bulletproof.

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The power to remove all flavour from food.

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The power to eat, just one, Lays potato chip.

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The power to die.

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The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

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the power to explain accidents when nobody gives a rats ass anymore

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The power to look into the car next to me at the exact moment the driver is picking his nose

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the power to automatically turn into a litlle girl when you see pedobear.

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the power to sing like a pro but only when in a bathroom or when autotune is involved...

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the power to emit free wifi which the signal strength varies by your erection.

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The power to throw a rock at the ground and miss

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The power to run at the speed of invisibility.

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The ability to not live forever

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The power to teleport all gold to criminals and or teleport criminals to gold

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The power to bend your finger...WITH YOUR MIND.

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The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

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The power to jump over mountains but die when you hit the ground.

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The power to turn everything you touch in to a plastic fork.

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The power to have incredible wet orgasms. if you are a man.

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The power to elect George W Bush.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!