the ability to eject a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to fly but only when your feet are on the ground

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to eat your poop

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to control Rollie pollies

thumb_up thumb_down +73

The power to turn gourmet meals into shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +73

the power to make your nipples taste like shit and your shit taste like nipples

thumb_up thumb_down +73

The power to not do it.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to remove all flavour from food.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The power to create a clean and temporary bathroom only you can use when you don't have to use one

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to quote Castlevania quotes all day... yelling them out on the streets! Moral: WHAT IS A MAN! People look at me and laugh... and moral man struts past... he has never been so awesome before... They see me rollin... they laughing... they lovin... and I hope nobody calls the ambulance because I am crazy... in love... I can see it in your eyes... I can see it in your smiiileeee...

thumb_up thumb_down +33

The power to heal yourself once every hundred years.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

The power to look into the car next to me at the exact moment the driver is picking his nose

thumb_up thumb_down +152

the power to sing like a pro but only when in a bathroom or when autotune is involved...

thumb_up thumb_down +140

the power to emit free wifi which the signal strength varies by your erection.

thumb_up thumb_down +138

The power to throw a rock at the ground and miss

thumb_up thumb_down +136

the ability to kill yourself... twice

thumb_up thumb_down +134

The power to run at the speed of invisibility.

thumb_up thumb_down +134

The power to propel urine at the top speed of the animal you most recently thought of.

thumb_up thumb_down +130

The power of hearing peoples conversations but only on topics related to Shrek.

thumb_up thumb_down +126

The power to go back in time, but only 1 second back and with a 10 second recharge.

thumb_up thumb_down +126

The ability to not live forever

thumb_up thumb_down +126

the power to be nonflammable unless your on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +118

The power to die everytime you pee

thumb_up thumb_down +116

The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

thumb_up thumb_down +114

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!