The power to eat broken glass and shit windows.

thumb_up thumb_down +123

The power to rip open my shirt to show a s t-shirt

thumb_up thumb_down +121

The power to achieve 98% opacity

thumb_up thumb_down +119

The power to be half invisible

thumb_up thumb_down +119

the power to talk to your elbow

thumb_up thumb_down +117

the power to fly but only about 5 feet above the grove, and only after you fart

thumb_up thumb_down +117

The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

thumb_up thumb_down +117

The power to switch any physical traits with your own reflection in the mirror.

thumb_up thumb_down +115

the power to sleep through a prison rape

thumb_up thumb_down +113

YOU CAN WISH BUT IT WILL NOT COME TRUE -.-

thumb_up thumb_down +111

The ability to throw a boomerang and have it come back to you

thumb_up thumb_down +109

The power to fly but only when your in space.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

The power to text while driving and dies of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

to spelle caretly

thumb_up thumb_down +105

The ability to go forward in time at will.

thumb_up thumb_down +105

the power to be invisible when sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +103

The power to solve every problem in the world. By dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

the power to teleport anywhere and see anything but every time to teleport there's 75% chance you'll die

thumb_up thumb_down +101

The power to be able to write the worlds best book or movie script but if anyone reads it, it will combust into flames.

thumb_up thumb_down +101

The power to transform into a green extremely skinny and weak guy when you get angry.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

The power to tolerate the excistance of Richard Davison

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The power to have explosive diarrhea when people are looking at you.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Hnavig the alibtiy to raed tihs.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!