The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

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The power to do nothing with your life.

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the power to do two suicide bombings

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The power to RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE, only for becoming a homoerotic bodybuilder addicted to steroids made from white bull testicles, and eating so many that you eventually become a golden werewolf, a blue hedgehog or something like that...

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the power to fart the alphebet

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The power to see the future, but have nobody believe you.

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The power to have tastebuds inside your ass.

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The power to whenever you watch tv you can only watch commercials.

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The power to love me. Moral: I have enough of my own. HE TORTURES YOU BECAUSE HE NEEDS YOUR LOVE, I DONT TOUCH YOU BECAUSE I REQUIRE NOT YOUR LOVE, WHO IS YOUR GOD NOW! (still not me, Gods and super sayans are foolish)

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The ability to know if you're the only human alive.

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The power to open a pickle jar in one try

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The ability to sit down without using any other body part than your butt.

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The power to (involuntarily) duplicate someone's wounds or illnesses by touching them.

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The power to punch that like button

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The power to use your penis as a lasso.

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The power to become normal the point is he has no powers

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The power to grow a beard really fast but only relative to the hair on your head

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The power to turn into a koi fish... but only when there is no water around.

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The ability to watch movies in 1D

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The ability to abruptly end conversations.

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The power to do 1d3 points of damage on successful touch attack twice a day assuming no spell resistance.

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The power to survive in space as long as you have a working space suit on.

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the power to be super ugly

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The powr to spell eviting wrong.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!