The power to change the tv channel only when you have the remote in your hands.

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The power to run slightly faster than Usain bolt

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The ability to become shit forever.

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The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

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The power to comment on Facebook with a pencil.

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The power to spell words incorrectly when speaking.

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the power to exit this site because of the maple story ad.

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The power to have a super power,

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the power to have good enough grammar to phrase the fu**ing power you want to share without sounding like a retarded deaf 6 year old

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the power to count from A to purple

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Acid pee

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The power to kick ass when your names aoife.

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The ability to create bruises on your body but not know where they came from, and then poke them.-.Jack

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The power to shovel well. To shovel very well.

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The ability to never get your comments featured on jacksfilms YIAY series

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The power to read minds, but only those of dead people.

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power to be the best theif ever known to man but only if your in the most high tech prison

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The power to go back in time one second at a time, but the ability takes one second to recharge.

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The power to be invulnerable to any type of bullets except lead and copper.

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The power to drown on land.

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The ability to make someone's heart stop, but only after they have died on their own of natural causes

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Moral man. Moral: I have self irony... which isn't a superpower... neither is being me... But its at least Super pointless and I have the power to do this... SO CLOSE! SO DAMN CLOSE! :(

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The power to make my own sandwich

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The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!