the power to read captchas

The power to smell thoughts.

The ability to walk on walls as long as you're laying sideways on the floor.

The power to speak in braille...

The power to turn into shit, but not be able to change back.

The power to fart in technicolor.

The power to plank

The power to speak parseltongue except when you're around snakes.

The power to make any woman have earth shattering totally consuming climaxes at will, but only if she's having sex with another man

The ability to get out of bed in a Monday morning even though you don't want to

The power to dace uncontrolably but not be able to stop...ever

The ability to levitate birds

The power to control sloths

The power to not get crushed, only if you're in contact with something.

The power to resurrect as a corpse when you die.

The power to heal someone's injuries by killing them.

The power to never stop shitting.

power to make your saliva taste like a 90 yr old diabetic old man who has tapeworms' poop

The power to think salmon.

the super power to be annoying.Oh wait...*cough cough* deadpool *cough cough*

the ability to lick your own anus

The ability to have all of the money in the world, but then have to share it with everybody in the world.

The ability to part...hair.

the power to read whenever somebody is about to make a pun but only if youve already heard that pun

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!