The power to stop your self from moving for all eternity

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I can talk to fish.... They don't have a lot to say

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The power to die.

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The ability to morph into someone else's left butt cheek

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the power to seduce hats

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The power to shit dirt!

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The power to go Skiing and ice skating in mid summer

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the power to be on fire always.(even when u are in water)

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A healing punch

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The power to turn Hydrogen Peroxide into water but only while you're using it to clean out your ears

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

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The power to run at the speed of a human

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The power to always lie even when you don't want to and then you have to truthfully say that you were lying otherwise the closest person kicks you in the groins.

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Brazilian waxing via telepathy.

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the power to do blink every 20 years

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The power to fail every time you try to do something

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the power not eat more than one pringel.

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the power to type without looking at the keyboard

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See the answers to any question inside your head while suffering from severe dyslexia.

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The power to teleport all gold to criminals and or teleport criminals to gold

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The power to see red in a slightly lighter shade

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the power to make broccoli taste like asparagus

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The power to expel a slight breeze after inhaling.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!