The power to become a lime only when you're left nipple brushes against your left shoe whilst it is superglued to your ding dong and you're strapped to a bed naked in the woods.

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The ability to have pockets in your skin that can only fit carrots.

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The ability to breathe underwater but only when above water

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The power to always be the next best fighter in any 1vs1 fight to the death. MORAL: KOMBAT!

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the power to allow dumbass powers to be written on this site

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The ability to kick your toe and get a headache

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The power to be the most attractive person ever but only in complete darkness.

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The power to give epilepsy to hamsters.

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The power to turn any traffic light and crosswalk sign from red to green but only when your eyes are closed.

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The power to not be able to laugh at good jokes and always have to laugh at the bad ones.

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The power to naturally wake up at a certain time but only if you set an alarm.

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the power to go on the internet, but only when there is no wi-fi

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The power to tell the future but no one believes you

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The power to steer a car pretty accurately.

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The power to give onesself a heart attack just by thinking about it.

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the power to turn invisible in corners but only in igloos

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The power to be the only person who can save mankind from creatures that don't exist.

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The power to break your pinkie fingers every time you look at them.

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Your average Axel entering a Phone Booth and coming out as... MORAL MAN! Moral: Where the damn do you find a Phone booth nowadays?

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50% invisibility while farting.

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to have the super power to do nothing

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The power to understand that Jesus called himself Son of man, which translates into Anderson, which makes a certain movie make a bit more sense. Moral: THIS IS MY WORLD MISTER ANDERSON! MY WOOOOOORLD!

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The power to use the english language to grammatical perfection. er, ferpection.

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The power to unwillingly turn into a girl when you have sex with your girlfriend or turn into a guy when you have sex with your boyfriend.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!