The power to realize that at least half of the top ten "powers" are yours, and you don't know if you are proud or ashamed of having so little to do... On the bright side, you don't sign them like some other douches...

The power to feel like your starving and everything tastes like crap.

The power to sing beautifully but only when around def people.

The power to make anyone have Donald Trump's hair.

The power to have amazing breath, but only if you brush your teeth first.

I have the power to make /b sarcastic, witty and funny.

The power to have orgasm everytime a cold breeze rolls in

The power of being able to rotate in non-rotatable chairs.

The ability to move your own internal organs, causing extruciating pain

The ability to predict what will appear on ReCaptcha, SOLVEmedia, and all that stuff, before you see it.

The power to live again but only while your still alive.

The power to touch anything that is touchable.

The power to meme 20% harder

the power to hear any alvin and the chipmunks song you want, but only when you have a migraine

Pointless Super Powers? Well Probably The Power To Sperm Uncontrollably.

The power to explode or fly at mach 10, but those powers can activate involuntarily, without warning

The power to send emails via pigeon

The power to shapeshift into a worm.

black people

The Power To Poop on Command.

The power to heal any wounds caused by the bite of an Indonesian speckled carpet shark in an area of slightly tepid saltwater any time between 3:00 and 4:00 in the afternoon

The power to remember your past failures and all the pain you ever received every time you close your eyes. And you have no appossable thumbs.

The power to instantaneously teleport in front of your mom each time you masturbate.

The ability to lead millions into committing mass genocide, proceeding this by killing yourself.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!