the ability to shit active helicopters >o

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Guys, it's over.

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the power to convert farts into burps.

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THE POWER TO FUCK ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU SUCK

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The power to predict yesterday's weather

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Knowing whether or not there is an afterlife

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The power to put water up my butt and squeeze and shitty water squirts out.

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the ability to die at will, just by blinking

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the power to make elton john gay

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the power to transform into biggie smalls after he just died

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the power to become friends with your least favorite teacher on facebook.

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The power to instantly see the end of a book or movie, but not the middle or beginning.

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the power to add .1 mile to the odometer of nearby vehicles

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The ability to summon CHUCK NORRIS, but only while naked.

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The power to be a normal person

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The power to talk to your socks but only when they're dying...

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the power to orgasm more than once in one round of sex. the thing is, after the 4th time, it gets slightly uncomfortable.

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The power to say something positive about Justin Beiber

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The ability to cause cancer, but only at your own joyful events, like on your birthdays, wedding day, etc.

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The power to transform into a bronie

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The power to jump inside the TV, but only when the screen is removed

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Liam Brudenell

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to have the super power to do nothing

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The power to read minds, but only your own.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!