The ability to never pick up on sarcasm.

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The ability to turn into Jeff the Magic Cactus Baby, for a second, while you are sleeping.

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The ability to make someone slightly attracted to a faucet.

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The useless pewer to increase your useless power at will! Moral: THE POWER TO SPAWN IN THE CENTER OF THE SUN AFTER DEATH INCREASE!

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The power to see in the dark only when you have a flashlight.

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The power to move infinitely fast up spiral staircases, but the inability to go down them.

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The power to phase through toilet paper.

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the power to read the thoughts of inanimate objects.

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The power to stop global warming on the planet Neptune.

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Imortality.

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The power to understand irony.

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The power to hear a person's thoughts, but only when they're on the toilet.

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The power to pee glass shards, but it still hurts.

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the power to not own a spacial power!!

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The ability to get a headache when you do or say something stupid.

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the power of piss mountain dew and shit cheeseburgers

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The ability to have night-vision, but only during the day

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The superpower to speak and write a language that only you know.

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the power to stop time for everything... including yourself

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THE POWER TO PREDICT THE PAST

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The power to get a huge penis with an erectile disfunction

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The power to travel forward in time at the speed of normal time.

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The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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ability to fly in a plane

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!