the power to make ads 0.000001 seconds shorter

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I am derpin the erp to derp the derp the erp o o o o yeah derp frika frika frika derp derp derp

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The power to see in the dark only when you have a flashlight.

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The ability to turn anything into cheese, but be lactose intolerant.

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The ability to be Rihanna only if in a car with Chris Brown

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the power to dance in the dark

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Your mom is so ugly, she was mercilessly bullied through high school and had severe depression and self-esteem issues. The power to post anti-jokes only on pointless superpowers.

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the power to command the sperm you ejaculate

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The power to inhale beverages through your genitals.

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The power to communicate through complex technology that was only developed 50 years ago and is still un known if it is harmful

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blindness

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The power to cry lava.

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the power to forget all you learned when taking the final. just so u could remember it later...

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The ability to piss flames.

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the ability to be on Oprah but only in the crowd

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The power to grow cancer cells

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The power to vote for Hillary Clinton and be happy with the decision that you made.

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the power to transform into pedobear with diplomatic immunity...

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the power that makes your ass turn into a shit machine gun, but you can only use it if its directed at your mouth.

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The power to write in invisible ink

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The ability to find objects in the last place you look

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The power to think about thinking about having the power to be stupid

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The uncontrollable power of making your sex partner sleep

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The ability to think about saying something,but then forget and spend an eternity trying to remember what it was.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!