to be able to walk on water for 2minutes at a time

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The awe-inspiring power of being able to throw up at will while yelling IMMA FIRIN' ME LAZOR.

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the power to change the day to sunday at 5:59am

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The ability to charge my iPhone, by starring at it real hard while rubbing my nipples!!!

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The power to levitate only down stairs

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The power to have super strength, but only when your sleeping.

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the power to be tall only if your Yao Ming

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The power to hear what your cat is thinking about.

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The ability not cry while cutting onions, only after hearing the news that a family member has just died

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The power to steal all the money in the world without ever stealing anything ever.

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The power to make me a sandwich without first being instructed.

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The power to return my ps4 for the third time, and wait for months to get a new one only to discover its the tv connection which is broken and I cant afford a new tv because I already spent a lot of money on ps4 games. Mural: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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the power to fly but only on a plane

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The ability to make broken pens work again.

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the power to know what kind of useless power would you prefer.

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The power to control which nut your sperm comes from.

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The power to slash hot c u m on a girls big t I t s

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The power to state Goku`s power level without crushing you`re scouter.

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the ability to "speak in tongues"...

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the power of 75% leviatation.

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the power to die when you breath oxygen

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The ability to shapeshift into any items but only pedophiles can use it

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The power to confess crimes you haven't committed.

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The power to tell if a politician is lying. (They always are.)

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!