- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to bend time and space in a way that would do nothing.

The power to like Justin Bieber

the power to walk an inch above land but only on labor day

The power to transform any food into shit simply by eating it.

the power to slightly darken the color of tree bark upon touch

The power to get an A+ on every test- but you need to study for 5 hours or so ahead of time

The power to metabolize any radioactive material in your body into arsenic.

The power to produce fish eggs from your left eye

Harnessing Homoeopathic wisdom.

the superpower of making pointless and lame jokes for which no human laughs (except crazy ones and apes)

The power to eat McDonald's in Wendy's.

The power to turn invisible when crossing the road.

The power to gain 400 pounds in 400 seconds.

The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

The power to enhance your enemy's strength

The power to be an idiot.

To be able to run the speed of light but only works if your standing still?.

The power to shoot glue from your penis

The ability to go to hell.

The power to turn a light on with your mind, but only if the light is already on

The power to know when to hold them, but not know when to fold them.

The power to turn into an exploding pink chair.

The power to be caught sniffing your sisters panties and get punished by having her crotch forced up and down yours while your mother licks your balls.

The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

Pointless Super Powers