The ability to have telekinesis on February the 30th

thumb_up thumb_down +84

The ability to poop glue.

thumb_up thumb_down +84

I have the power to force farts out of my ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +84

The power to enhance your enemy's strength

thumb_up thumb_down +82

yo mama

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power to only be able to eat poop

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power to surround yourself in fire, but only when you're underwater.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

thumb_up thumb_down +80

The power to be light and stand against darkness. Moral: FU Destiny!

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to think of witty comebacks 3 days too late

thumb_up thumb_down +72

The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

thumb_up thumb_down +70

The power to write pointless superpowers

thumb_up thumb_down +70

The power to become attractive to women. but only when your with elderly people and Sarah Palin.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The power to turn into a pebble

thumb_up thumb_down +62

The power to knock yourself unconscious

thumb_up thumb_down +62

The power to beat up anyone but only if u sneeze first

thumb_up thumb_down +60

the power to time travel to the present

thumb_up thumb_down +60

the ability to stop time on your watch, wall clocks, and everything that runs on battery.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

the power to fall at 9.9m per second.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

The power to make anything money related to disappear.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

power to fly when your underwater

thumb_up thumb_down +52

The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

making a sentence of pointless superpowers on pointlesssuperpower.com.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!