The ability to lift small objects with your mind, but only if you are touching them.

the power to read your own mind

the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

The power to lower your own ego.

the power to poop dogs without fur.

The power to be on mars. Not survive, not go between mars and earth. You could just instantaneously be on mars, then probably die.

the power to turn everthing you touch into to some form of pork but you are an orthodox jew

The power to be out of the kitchen... and a woman

power to eat 500000 big macs in a day

The power to eat the booty like a poor person's groceries

The ability to instantly make all your clothes vanish but only when you're in a job interview

The power to ignore useful information

The power to create a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that creates a power that does nothing.

The power to forget everything u learned during a test.

The power to be asleep while in bed

The power to eat food a little faster. So when you are done you have to just stay there for 5 more minutes for everybody to finish

the power to read when you're not looking at any word or symbol

The ability to give yourself any super power, but you cannot use it if it is used.

The power to fly whenever you sneeze.

The power to turn Justin Bieber into a cat and kill him 9 times

The ability to breath in a complete vacuum, but not anywhere else

The power to become the worlds most famous necrophilia pørnstar after dying.

the power to jump, but only on any surface

The power to become tired at will but never sleep.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!