The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

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The power to be stupid reading this.

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The power to uncontrollably say "thats what she said" whenever it is possible, even if its really shitty

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to obey gravity

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Invisibility, when no one is looking.

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The power to turn any object into food

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the power to shoot fireballs.....only when your under water

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The power to flush toilets with your mind

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The power to punch with the force of hulk ... But Die instintly

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The power to become THE APOCALYPSE But you are NOT FIT TO SURVIVE....

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Super empathy! The power to feel the suffering of every living being...

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The power to predict the present

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The ability to make yourself rich unless you are using it on yourself...

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The ability to give yourself a stroke just using your mind.

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The power to use a rectangular prism to generate electricity to go on a square-shaped object full of pixels and create things with it.

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The power to write pointless superpowers

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the power to stare at pit bulls in the eyes and imitate them

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The ability to see women naked, but only if they weigh 400 pounds or more.

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The power to explode when someone looks at you and regenerate in 10 minute after exploding but you can only regenerate from exploding.

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The Power of your footstep sounding like a horse gallop

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The power to go back in time, but only as Anne Frank during the Holocaust.

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The power to lose body parts by merely thinking about losing said parts coupled together with worry. I.e. I hope I don't lose my testicles.... Damn-it!!

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The power to die

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!