The power of becoming sick when you need it.

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The power to be reading this when you can WORSHIP ME! Moral: You love me, I love me, we all win! Now, bring forth thy sacrifices, women, gold, diamonds, women, more women, yeah... And if you are a woman, you can come many many times with me...

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The Superpower to return and never again fade, the day Moral Man stands against the whole world, the world may just be worth eliminating. Moral: Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you dooown..

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THE POWER TO BE INVISIBLE WHEN NO ONE IS LOOKING...

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The power to smell whore

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the power to get married

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The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

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The ability to get free housing for at least 25 years after running over your neighbor.

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The power to be alone

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The ability to be smart, but only if you study for the first 18 years of your life

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The power to enlarge your penis to any size, but only you can see it.

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The power to walk upside down but only when you're in Australia.

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The power to turn into an exploding pink chair.

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The power to fuck your moms pussy at will (her opinion or desire means nothing to the will of your useless superpower!). Moral: SONS OF SICKMAN FRAUD REJOICE!

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the power to predict Justin Beiber's next album

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Have god like powers but only on 30 of february

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The ability to walk backwards... backwards.

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The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

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The power to crap without pissing.

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The power to cause weeds to grow twice as fast as usual in your bed of prized petunias.

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The power to turn any object into food

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The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

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The power grow arm pit hair 5 times faster and 5 times longer than it was after shaving.

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The ability to get shot, for real.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!