The power to crap without pissing.

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The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

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The power to keep up with the kardashians

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the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

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The ability to see women naked, but only if they weigh 400 pounds or more.

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The power to control the weather, but only in space

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The power to have night vision when there's daylight.

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The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

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The power to phase through walls whenever there is a door nearby leading to the next room

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The power to appear dancing like a girl at the background of every Justin Bieber "music" "video"

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To the comment below: You wont get a chance to miss me mortal... Moral: The color of envy... you wish you could be like me... everyone of you, yet some of you got the balls/pussies to prove it! For the people! For the freedom of speech! For courage and strength! For balls of steel! For the ladies... and most importantly... because I f*cking want to! NOW AND FOREVER! I AM MORAL MAN!

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The power to drink 10 gallons of water only when you desperately need to piss.

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The superpower to fly but when you reach 55 feet up you loose your power

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The power to turn everything one touches with one's hand into skittles, but only applying to amputees.

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the power to like Hilary Clinton

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To have the power to give yourself a disease

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The ability to watch movies in 1D

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The ability to look at yourself in anything, except a mirror.

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The power to not being able to go use the bathroom when you have to

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The power that turns farts into music.

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The ability to change your hair color to your current hair color

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The power to fly when in something flying

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The power to die on command.

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the power to get wider by eating junk food

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!