- Pointless Super Powers

the ability to add edges to any circle on anything that you can write on

The power to bend time and space in a way that would do nothing.

The power to become mentally retarded only when you get an erection.

The power to know when to hold them, but not know when to fold them.

the ability to make your eyes pop out.

The power to swim on land.

The power to telepathically open umbrellas, only open and only umbrellas.

the power to half transform to something.

The ability to look at someone and die.

The power to fly whenever you sneeze.

The power to ignore useful information

The power to know the end of every movie ever.

the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

The power to bounce a beach ball with lightly above-average accuracy

Have god like powers but only on 30 of february

The power to have intense orgasms, but only if you choke yourself.

The power to smell anything you look at, but you can't turn it off.

The ability to fart extremely loudly every time you blink - but only when having dinnerwith your girlfriends parents for the first time.

The power to metabolize any radioactive material in your body into arsenic.

The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

The power to eat food a little faster. So when you are done you have to just stay there for 5 more minutes for everybody to finish

The power to get a cold in the wintertime.

The ability to turn your fingers into angry bears without you being able to control them

The power to breath under water, while your in a submarine.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!