The power to disintegrate yourself

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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The power to teleport massive objects one inch above your head.

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The power to flush toilets with your mind

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The power to wear the same clothes every day without them getting dirty.

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you can summon raccoons, but all they do is piss on your shit

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the power to have super strength but only wile you are sleeping,

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Ability to fly 3 feet off the ground and at normal walking speed

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The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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The power to read the minds of sandwhiches.

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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The Power of your footstep sounding like a horse gallop

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The power to vomit every time you burp.

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The power to have super hearing but only works when you are dead.

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the passive ability to teleport to the center of the world every tenth of a second

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The power to level up on a game which you can't level up on.

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The power to hold your breath when you die

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The power to fall asleep each time you

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The power to have 99 problems, except your dog... if she is female.

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The ability to open a door that was already open.

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The Power to fart extremely loudly every time your in a crowd.

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Justin Bieber

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Infinite knowledge when dead

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!