An extra set of eyes...in your scrotum

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Nobody in the world has super-powers.

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The ability to go blind every time you open your eyes

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the power to cook sandwiches when married

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The power to die and not come back to life.

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Be invincible...but only when you're NOT in danger.

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The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

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The power to have a invisible boat mobile

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To Turn Thin To Macho but only in left arm

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the ability to spin gold into straw

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The super power to shine in daylight

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The power to create peanut butter and jelly sandwiches without having any peanut butter.

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The Power to sh*t your food before eating it.

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the power to stare at someone without blinking or smiling for ever

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The power to drink 10 gallons of water only when you desperately need to piss.

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The ability to pass out at will.

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The power to serve the Lord Dog.

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THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

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the ability to see through any vitreous walls or objects

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The left part of your body is fireproof but the right side is not

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The power to psychically flush any toilet in the world once every 27 minutes.

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The power to walk on water... but drown in land.

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The involuntary power (or rather compulsion) to add "collectors edition" to everything you ever give or sell or buy. "Old bike, but in perfect condition: Collectors edition" "Hi I am selling my body "Collectors edition" "Sadly I am allergic to my German shepherd: "Collectors edition" so I have to give it away." "Hi excuse me, where do I find the "collectors edition" Milk in this store? Eh? No any kind of "collectors edition Milk is fine" Sigh... What I mean is...

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The power to be oppressed by everything

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!