The power to cash cheques that are only ever made out to someone else.

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The power to teleport stupid people away from you - but they teleport to YOUR HOUSE.

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The power to hear a "SSSSSSSS" sound, then be blown up.

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The ability to control dairy products

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being black

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to make your bowel work backwards

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The abiltity to grow an additional 4 fingered hand from your inner thigh

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the power to animate condiments

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the power to pay 1 cent less then what items in the store cost

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The power to hear in the dark.

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The power to read this.

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THE POWER OF PEDOBEAR!!!!! but only when theres law enforcement around

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The ability to be born, live for about 75 years and then die.

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The ability to telekinetically form crop circles in your own pubic hair.

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the power to fax people with your mind

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The power to see your reflection with The Mirror

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The Superpower to sleep at night.

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The power to feel like you're gonna sneeze forever

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to eat a pie and get to fart an apple (cus why not)

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The power to teleport 13,000,000,000 lightyears but not be able to return.

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The power to keep up with the kardashians

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The power to journey into the future of the past.

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the power to get F's on assignments without trying

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!