The power to shit out toilet paper.

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The power think five times slower.

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The power to remove cancer from stroke victim's bodies.

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The power to turn water into ice but only in sub zero temperatures

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The power to not care.

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The power to swear if you do not believe in a God. Moral: Meh... if I post anything against God here you guys will thumb me down and that matters... it matters so much that I will use the section over to shit talk God... yeah... thumb me down already fearing zealots... show me your true power (being Gods bitches) now that is pointless power!

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The power to make anyone you see look surprise.

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the power to have 20/20 vision only when wearing aviators

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The power to hold your breath when you die

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The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

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The power to bounce a beach ball with lightly above-average accuracy

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The power to shrink boobs by merely touching them.

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The ability to kill anyone, only if he/she is your close friend.

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The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

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The ability to know any language but only after learning it.

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the power to see everything as if it were a 1 year olds dralling.

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the power to pay 1 cent less then what items in the store cost

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The power to read this.

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the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

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The power to be able to make something usable but have it disappear when you try to use it.

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The power to be a common person

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the power to defecate while standing up...

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The ability to be born, live for about 75 years and then die.

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The power to make any glass of water into milk

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!